There's been a pit in my stomach ever since I began reading about Gosnell and the horrors in his practice.  A pit in my stomach, because of the graphic detail in which he "ended pregnancies."  Yes, I've heard how it's done before from time to time.  But, this was a named man in a for real trial that actually did these horrible things.  He didn't just "end pregnancies."  He ended LIFE!  Not to mention the lives of the mothers he endangered.

I realize that you all know by now my stance on abortion.  If not, you can look back here.  I am not a politically-minded person, and I don't plan to blog politics here.  What I will not do is stand idly by while innocent lives are being murdered.  Lives.  That's what these babies are.  Not a fetus.  Not tissue.  Life.  Life that is unable to stand up for itself.  Life that depends solely on the woman carrying it.  

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you..." Jeremiah 1:5

These babies are your children.  Your 10 year old or your 40 year old.  They are lives.  Most of these abortions are "unplanned pregnancies."  Those babies are Millie Janalee.  And I'm guessing that many of you have even had "unplanned" pregnancies as well.  Even if it was a complete joy to find out. 

So, you see, I will NOT stand by and say nothing.  There are heroes out there.  I know one of them.  I know her name.  I know what she looks like.  I've even met her.  Millie Janalee's birthmother is a hero.  Her birthfather is too, for that matter.  These heroes stood against something "unplanned" and knew that this pregnancy may not have been planned...but that this LIFE was perfectly planned.  In case you missed my feelings about birthmothers...you can see that here.  Praise God for their strength and their decision to give Millie Janalee life! 

"...and before you came forth out of the womb I sanctified you, and I ordained you a prophet unto the nations." Jeremiah 1:5

What many women, I fear, neglect to realize is that there is a better option.  It's not the easiest option.  But it is better.  I've heard women say, "I could never do that to my child!" when offered the adoption option.  And, what I want to scream to the top of my lungs is, "You would never make a plan for your child to live a life you cannot give them...but you will kill them?!"  It makes absolutely no sense to me.  Except that these women may not realize how much better adoption is now.  Open adoptions are the norm these days, and birthmothers are updated all time through letters, emails, and sometimes even meetings.  It is OUR job, as adoptive parents and those whose lives have been touched by adoption, to educate these women on the better option.  It is OUR job to help alleviate the fear and let them know that THEY can choose the plan they desire for their child and the degree of openness they want.  Adoption is beautiful!  It takes courage.  It takes maturity.  It takes a great deal of love.

Once upon a time, Millie Janalee (and your child) was just a blip on an ultrasound.

And now, that "blip" looks like the beautiful, spunky, smiley, blue-eyed little girl I rock to sleep each night.  That "fetus" claps her hands and giggles and squeals.  That "tissue" sticks her tongue out and blows raspberries at us every day.  That "unplanned pregnancy" is full of beauty and has a beautiful planned life ahead of her!  A life God has planned perfectly. 

I love what I read today, and I'm going to use it for myself.  Changing just two letters brightens the lives of my little family of three forever!

First Friends

What a difference 7 months can make!!  That was then, and this is now.  In September, Millie Janalee met her very first friend, Caroline.  Caroline is 12 days younger than Millie Janalee.  This is the future Class of 2030 we think.  Our math may be off a little, and since my brain is fried...I'll just go with that!

Mary Anne, Caroline's mommy lives in my hometown.  And since Russ and I are hoping to return sooner rather than later, we've decided these two little girlies need to be acquainted.  Millie Janalee and Caroline spend time in the church nursery together quite often, but it was so much fun to let them interact on the floor.  They just squealed and giggled and reached for each other.  It. was. the. cutest. thing. EVER!

We took tons of pictures and a few videos of the cuteness before we decided to take this party outside in the sunshine!  Auntie Kristin joined us too.  She and Mary Anne graduated high school together.  We told the girls about moving locations, and look at the reactions...

It was a beautiful day, and the girls were so funny.  Caroline never missed a beat.  She continued with her spunky playfulness, while Millie Janalee looked at us like, "Really?  In this heat?  With the sun in my face?"  Ha!

A little repositioning, and Millie Janalee was back in the game!  The two sweet girls took long looks at each other, checking each other's attire for the day.  They talked some more.  Then, they began sharing their "tricks" with each other.

Caroline showed Millie Janalee how she can lift her tummy off the ground by lifting up on her knees.  Caroline isn't crawling yet either, but her itty bitty body can move a little more than Millie Janalee's.  I blame it on the extra 4 pounds Millie Janalee is carrying around.

Millie Janalee showed Caroline how she claps.  Caroline wasn't clapping yet, but she watched and tried her best.  Millie Janalee was a great teacher!  She showed her over and over and over again.  Caroline just watched intently and smiled.

"Watch this!"

"That is so neat!  How do you do that?"

"Okay.  Put your hands like this, and..."

Another thing these girls enjoyed doing is touching each other.  They held hands and touched arms and pulled clothes.  Millie Janalee loved Caroline's strings on her bubble, and Caroline must've just wanted to take Millie Janalee's outfit off completely.  Ha!

Sweet friends!

"OH!  I love to put strings in my mouth!"

"I just love the way green looks on you, girl!"

"Well, thank you!  I like that octupus smocking too!"

They got pretty close after awhile.  Millie Janalee and Caroline leaned on each other, grabbed each other, talked to each other, and just wanted to be super close.  It was the funniest thing to watch!  Some moments were funnier than others!  You'll see what I mean...

Getting closer...

Caroline took things into her own hands!  Hahahaha!

She also just wanted to be sure Millie Janalee's two teeth and eyes were okay.  Ha!

It's funny how children change your "running buddies".  And by "running buddies" I by no means actually mean running.  I mean friends you talk to frequently or hang around.  Mary Anne is my sister's friend from high school, but having babies so close in age gives us a definite common ground.  We text frequently and ask questions about development or give advice when one of us finds a great snack or idea and share shopping locations.  Ha!  We both have a Zulily problem.  I'm actually grounded from Zulily at the moment.  (Have I mentioned that before?  Ha!)

It's also funny to see how much we've changed nine months into motherhood.  We are quite different sometimes on schedules and routines, but we are similar too.  We both want our babies to stay little forever.  We both want them to eat baby food forever, so we won't have anymore choking scares.  We both rock our babies to sleep and to nap...and I will as long as I can.  We also both kept our baby girls in our bedrooms forever!  And, I'm not ashamed.  Ha!

It got a little hot playing outside, so we came in for a little juice and snack.  This is where Caroline showed off another one of her "tricks."  She can turn that juice cup up like a champ.  Millie Janalee...not so much.  Ha!  Caroline shared her Cheerios, and Millie Janalee snacked on them for the first time.  She was a fan!   But, she was also a big fan of the Cheerio box itself...

After a great play date, it was time for Caroline's nap.  So, we said our goodbyes with a few more squeals and giggles and promised to come play again soon!

We're counting on sharing these photos in a few years.  I'm thinking in a Follies program or their Senior yearbook!  Ha!  Sweet time with our sweet friends!

Everyday Family Fun Moments

I blog a lot about big firsts or events in our little family life, but I rarely just post about our everyday moments.  So, I'll do that now.  Of course, my everyday moments while Russ works may look a little boring to all of you.  For your sake, I'll just share some everyday family fun moments from this past week.

I think I shared that Millie Janalee loves bubbles.  I've been wanting to buy a bubble machine so badly.  I've talked about it very often.  Ask my family.  Ha!  Finally, I ran to Target and purchased an inexpensive bubble machine for us to try.  I showed Russ, and he grabbed his camera for the fun.

Except...Millie Janalee didn't get the memo about the fun part.  The machine makes a noise as it has a battery operated fan inside to blow the bubbles.  Apparently, this scares her.

Mama sat with Millie Janalee and held her tight while the bubble machine kept going.  She would look up at me and back at the bubbles.  Up at me and back at the bubbles.  This scenario repeated itself a few times before she tried to reach out and touch a bubble or two.

I took that as a sign that she was ready for me to loosen my grip a bit.  I was determined not to just turn the machine off and never use it again.  I was trying to give her time to get used to it and realize it was fun.  Ha!  Does that make me a pushy parent?  Anyway, I stood her up right in front of me and talked her through every bubble.  "Yaaayyy!"  "Yaaaayyy!"  "Yaaayyy!"  You get the idea.  She still wasn't sure.

Eventually, she began reaching out for all the bubbles.  She was very cautious.  Not too excited.  Just cautiously trying to catch them.  As she slowly moved her arms around and touched a few bubbles, my "Yaaayyy!"s became fewer and far between.

Until she was clapping on her own for the bubbles!  Yay!  Mission accomplished.

For dessert Tuesday night, I decided to let Millie Janalee try some diced apples.  Eating with her hands.  I do realize that she is nine months old, and I have not really let her eat "messy" foods with her hands yet.  I'll admit that I've kinda been dreading this part.  I know it's fun and cute to watch babies rub baby food through their hair and up their nose.  But, the thought of all the stickiness getting in the crooks and crevices of anything she touches makes me cringe. Ha!  She basically mushed it all around and ate a few pieces before she was totally over it.  I fed her the rest on a spoon, and she enjoyed her diced apples.  Russ just decided she's a "young lady" and was being polite.  Regardless, we went straight to the bath afterward to wash off the sticky mess.  The apples had been soaked in white grape juice...so they were certainly sticky!

Last night, Russ and I played dress up with our little doll.  Millie Janalee and I will travel for her nine month pictures today, so I needed to try a few outfits on her to decide what I wanted to use.  While we were on a roll, I got her to try on a few more things for the summer.  And, we certainly found a favorite!

My little supermodel was working one of her umpteen million swimsuits!  Russ and I were rolling in the floor laughing about how precious she was!  Oh my!

We immediately sent a text to my family saying, "Show me to my beach chair please.  And bring me a baby daiquiri too."  This girl is beach ready, and we are counting down to our annual family beach vacation!

I was exhausted after pulling clothes on and off and trying to get Millie Janalee to sit still and turning her around and around and standing her up and...well, you get the point.  So, while I cleaned up, Russ took her into the living room to watch the Goodnight Show on Sprout.  Russ found it very funny that I could sing all the words.  "Oh, Honey.  If you only knew what all theme songs I have memorized these days."  Russ was very into meeting the cast of the Goodnight Show...as was Millie Janalee.

Sweet Daddy/Daughter time!

There you have it!  A few fun everyday family moments in the life of this Party of Three!  Livin' this life and LOVIN' it!

Runners United

Like many of you, much of my time has been spent watching or listening to the news coverage of the Boston marathon bombing.  Most of you that follow us on Facebook or know us in real life, already know that this bombing was more to us than a tragic event in our country.  This bombing was more personal.

You see, Russ's brother and his wife and several of their friends ran the Boston marathon this year.  Roan and her family are very dedicated, and I have watched and listened to her strategize as she spends so much of her precious time training for this marathon.  The Boston marathon is a big deal, and you must qualify to run.  It's the "holy grail" of marathons, I've heard it described.  So on April 15th, shortly after 2:50 pm, my heart began to pound as I saw the Breaking News coverage interrupt our channels.  I had been tracking Roan throughout the day and picked up my phone to track her again when I saw it.  I immediately began texting Roan's best friend, Lynn, to see if she knew anything.  She did not, and she was freaking out with me.  I knew that Jimmy had finished the race, but I had no idea if he was standing on the sideline near the finish waiting on Roan.  I called Russ to fill him in after several minutes of failed attempts trying to find out any information, and I texted Russ's sister.  For the next hour, we all texted and called and checked social media for any update from any of the runners we knew.  All this while news commentators described the scene and the injuries.  I couldn't sit down.  I was pacing with a fussy baby on my hip.  I passed Millie Janalee off to my mom for a nap while I frantically tried to find out anything...even though there was no news.  We did eventually get word by a third party that all our runners were safe.  But, it wasn't until I received a personal word from Roan that I felt completely at peace.  It was a frightening day for our family.  But, as frightened as we were waiting helplessly imagining the worst and praying for the best, I cannot imagine the chaos and fear that our family and friends felt in the midst of it all.  Russ's brother had just finished and was only 300 feet or so away when the first bomb exploded.  He could feel it.  Another good friend of theirs was also very close.  Roan was stopped at mile 25.8...that's 0.4 miles from the finish.  It would be over an hour before she would find out if Jimmy was okay.  Please please please read about her experience here.  She was also interviewed for their local news.  Click here to see that.

We are all so thankful for their safety and God's protection over them.  We are still praying for peace and nights of uninterrupted sleep for them.  The images, sounds, and experiences of that terrible day still haunt them.  Our hometown put together a Runners United Run for Boston event on Monday evening.  When I told Russ that I would probably travel to support them, he expressed an interest in going as well.  He really wanted to just see Jimmy and Roan and visit with them since their return.  So, Russ drove up after work on Monday to support the runners and see his brother and wife.  We all did.  I was so impressed by the turnout.  This run began as a very informal event for the group of local runners, but the support by the community and those neighboring communities was outstanding!  There were many who didn't run, but came to cheer on the runners.

Russ's sister, Russ, and Millie Janalee

Elle, Will, Jeff, Millie Janalee, and Russ

Avery, Lynn, me, and Millie Janalee

I am no runner, although I tried it briefly once.  But, I am always inspired by runners.  If you have never watched a half- or full marathon, go do it!  Stand near the finish line and be inspired as you cheer on those amazing athletes who trained tirelessly and are emotionally, mentally, and physically drained.  I cry every single time.  I am surrounded by friends and family who inspire me by their running and dedication.  And I'll cheer them on again!  And again.  And again.

The local Boston marathon runners

Jimmy with our hometown running Koach (Yes, with a K)

The runners uniting for Boston!

Before the run, the local Boston runners were honored and recognized.  The mayor spoke about our hometown and how proud we are to be a part of this event and these runners' lives.  One of the ladies in charge read a letter to Koach Kenneth from one of their local running buddies.  Tears were shed.  We all prayed together and shared a moment of silence before the whistle blew for the start of the run.

The runners were instructed to run as much or as little of the Coke 10K route in order to return to the starting spot by 7:30.  There were runners of all ages, shapes, sizes, and paces!  I loved watching runners, racers, bikers, strollers, and walkers coming together to show their support!  And don't forget us spectators!  We had a blast visiting and cheering on the runners as they neared the finish.

Daddy, Millie Janalee, Kristin, Mama, and Mrs. Joan

Kelly and Russ

Elle, her mom, and Jenny

Kristin sporting her blue and yellow for Boston.  I also think the sign in the background is hilarious!

It was such fun watching families run in together.  Friends jogging in.  Runners preparing for the Coke race coming up in two weeks.  Ladies enjoying a walk for a good cause.  Spectators cheering  and clapping as participants passed.

At 7:30, there was something special planned.

After I found out that Jimmy and Roan were okay, I turned to my mom and said, "Do you even know how hard and long Roan has trained for this?  How much time she whittled and carved out of her busy life to train for this marathon?  And she didn't even get to finish?!"  I realize that sounds trivial when compared to the loss of life and limb and emotional distress felt by many or all who were there.  But, it is a big deal.  I've never trained for a marathon.  But, I've seen the pain and tears and dedication and sacrifice of those who have.  I've seen the weeks and months spent sore, scheduling huge blocks of time for long runs.  I've also seen my sister-in-law...my friend...survive breast cancer only to train again for bigger and better goals than ever before.  Including a Boston marathon!  THIS...the finish of a Boston marathon...was also stolen that day.  It was stolen from Roan and from Koach Kenneth, who had knee problems and was running a slower pace than normal.

I am so glad that the organizers of this run prepared a special "Boston finish" for them! 

The spectators, runners, and walkers lined the street as they came running in together.  We cheered them on with tear-filled eyes.  Or maybe that was just me.  Ha!  Jimmy presented his medal to Roan while Heather (Roan's friend) let Koach borrow hers for his finish.  This was Koach's 12th Boston marathon maybe? (I know he has run the Boston marathon several times)

Jimmy presenting Roan with her medal

Roan and Jimmy

Based on Roan's face in the pictures I have, I think she was fighting back tears.  I know I was crying.  Roan hasn't said a word to me about not finishing or her disappointment in it.  But every runner, after the pain and tears of the journey, wants the high and the exhilaration of the finish. We are so thankful to have our friends and family back home safe and sound!  We are also thankful for the group of people who organized such a special event...even down to the details of a Boston finish.

Roan and Heather

Heather is Roan's friend who also ran that day.  She was the first word we got that Roan and Jimmy were okay.  You can read her story here.

After the run, we walked down to Russ's parents' home to visit and enjoy pizza.  It was good to have the family (and a few friends) back together again.  All safe.  All thankful.

Millie Janalee, Anna Kate, and Seth

And in two weeks, these runners will run again in our local famous Coca-Cola 10K.  And I will watch from the finish.  Will you?