First of all, let me say that our home has now been nearly odor free since Sunday!  Woo hoo!  I'm keeping my fingers crossed that this is a trend!  Only time will tell.  When I was getting ready this morning, I smelled a faint smoky odor.  But I'm hoping that is all it was...faint and temporary.  I poured all the vinegar out yesterday, and I still have the air filter plug-in going in the dining room and guest bathroom.  I'm probably headed to Lowe's soon to pick up a few more just to be safe.  Thanks for the suggestions!  Charcoal will be my next ammo if needed.  Ha!

I also want to take this opportunity to let you all know how overwhelmed I was at the response and encouragement I received on my "Gettin' Real" blog post.  I truly have been blessed by this blog, all of my readers, and our prayer warriors!  Thank you so much!  This past week has been so much better!

To be honest I get my days mixed up these days...but I just know the last several days have been wonderfully pleasant!  The weather has been perfect, the pollen seems to have settled a bit since our last rain, and my attitude has been much more upbeat.  I'm so thankful for that!  Russ and I have started "exercising" together 30 minutes a day.  I walk my two miles while he rollerblades alongside me, ahead of me, and back past me again.  Ha!  He HATES walking!  He would much rather be doing P90X, running, or lifting weights.  But I was a little leery of walking around alone at first.  So, we made a compromise.  He would rollerblade just where he could keep an eye out...and hear me if I scream.  Ha!  And it has been nice for us to do something active together.  Even if we really aren't technically together.

We also made a trip to Memphis Saturday to watch October Baby.  I don't know if you have heard of it or not.  The movie is only playing in select locations...3 of which are in Memphis.  I did see that it was playing in our hometown also.

Let me just say that, in my opinion, it is a movie you will want to see!  I know after Amendment 26 here in Mississippi, there are MANY different views on abortion.  I want to say that Russ and I both were discussing the movie afterward, and we couldn't really find any reason why all sides wouldn't be moved by the story line.  It truly is a movie about forgiveness and healing...just like the previews have stated.  Please take note of this: STAY FOR THE CREDITS!  Phenomenal!

I don't want to give anything away, so take a look at the trailer and see for yourself...

I highly recommend you take your family to see this moving and inspirational movie!  Such a tremendous opportunity to show America and the movie industry that movies don't have to be rated R to be highly successful!  I just read that some theaters are only showing October Baby through Thursday...so make plans to see it before it's gone!  Check your local times to be sure you will get a chance to see it.

Eliminating Odors...Part One

 I am obsessed with odors.  By odors, I mean smell-good Wallflowers, candles, and other scents.  I have at least one Wallflower in every room, hallway, and bathroom.  I love to walk into my home, take a deep breath, smile, and relax.  I love that my guests always comment on the smell when they first enter our home.  A good smell.

Well.  My obsession is being tested.  As you know by now, Russ and I moved into an apartment complex when we first moved to this area.  For a few reasons:

1. Because we wanted to get familiar with the area before we looked into a more permanent dwelling. 
2. Because we wanted to use mortgage, repair, and upkeep money to help us save for our adoption.
3. It's just US.  We don't need much, so why not live in an apartment while we can.
4. We lost way too much money when we sold our precious home in Jackson, so we were NOT the least bit interested in buying again until we knew we were settling for a long time.

We have recently been blessed with a new neighbor.  I will say that our neighbor is very friendly, and I have no problem with her at all.

Except. For. The. Odor.  The cigarette smoke odor.

We have since learned that this has been an issue before.  Apparently, side by side neighbors share some part of the ventilation system...or something like that.  Because we can smell the horrid smell.  I was nearly knocked down when I opened my door the other day.  Yuck!  It's worse in certain parts of our apartment.  We have talked with management, who in turn talked to our neighbor yesterday afternoon.  She was very nice and wanted to apologize, but our manager didn't tell her who complained.  She also said she was trying to quit.  The manager suggested she leave her windows open with a fan or smoke outside.  I was satisfied with the result of that conversation.

Until.  This morning.

Russ and I both had headaches and began to smell the pungent odor.  Now, if we could smell it after sleeping there and sitting in it all night and morning, I know it must've been strong.  Meaning...if we had just arrived home, we would be knocked down upon opening the door.  I was near tears with frustration and worry.  What if my clothes smell like it?  What if our furniture smells like it?  What if the baby's room smells like it?  How can I bring a baby home to this stench?  We went to the apartment office to get a copy of our lease and explain our dissatisfaction.  We asked about the option of switching apartments, and I suggested designated smoking and non-smoking apartments.  That seemed like a common sense solution to a problem that has happened before.  And the idea of packing up and moving again wears me out!  Plus, why would I move to another apartment if it could happen again?  So far, we have gotten a scented filter to put on our air filter.  Big whoop!

So, we took it upon ourselves to find some sort of solution to get us through until at least tomorrow.  I did what anyone who wants suggestions does...I posted on Facebook.  I got advice immediately!  I'll try them one at a time.

The second suggestion was to set bowls of white vinegar around the home, especially where the smell is strongest.  I had already read this online, and it was something I already had in the pantry.  So, I began.

I poured white vinegar into bowls, and I began to set them around the apartment. 

The strongest smelling areas are the ones against the adjoining wall to our neighbor.  So, I placed one bowl in our kitchen, one in our laundry closet, and one bowl in our dining room.

I placed bowls in our bathrooms too.  These are the worst areas.  We think she may use her bathroom as her smoking quarters.

We also made a trip to Lowe's to try to find some sort of inexpensive air purifier.  We came across this plug in the wall air filter.  It is supposed to eliminate odors...not mask them.  We shall see.

I have lived in apartments for many of my young adult years...7 to be exact, and this is the first time I have encountered this problem.  If we had moved in after a smoker, I wouldn't be quite as overwhelmed because I would trust that the odor would eventually leave.  However, with a smoker next door...and the odor filtering through our vents...I'm not quite sure how to solve this!

We will try this for now.  I hope it works and that there is no "Part Two," but I'm not feeling too optimistic.  Our second option is to set charcoal around the apartment.  Wondering if we will smell like a barbeque pit....

Any suggestions?

Praying for More...

...in Haiti

Our hometown church just returned from a mission trip to Haiti.  Danielle tagged me in this precious picture yesterday, and I absolutely LOVE it!  Such a reminder of the MANY blessings we have in this country.  A reminder of just how much we have to be thankful for!  To read more about their trip, you can read Jennifer's blog here. 

Gettin' Real

Okay.

It's time to get real.

I've done my fair share of pep talking and sugar coating and positive thinking.  Now, I'm about to get real.  The funny thing is...I have no idea who reads this blog on a daily basis. I have no idea who I'm sharing all these thoughts and special events with. I only know who comments and who talks about the blog with me in person.  But, I'm gonna give you a taste of my reality.

If I'm gettin' real with you, I'd have to tell you that...at some point during most days, I could go crazy with anticipation, excitement, and anxiety.

If I'm gettin' real with you, I'd have to tell you that...I feel like I'm dragging my feet through the day, sometimes, just waiting to get to the next day. You know...in case the next day is THE day.

If I'm gettin' real with you, I'd have to tell you that...I check the waiting families website multiple times a day looking for another placement.

If I'm gettin' real with you, I'd have to tell you that...I actually took Farley into Baby J's room and rocked him in the glider the other night. Just to try it out for size. And, it fits quite well. I'm just thinking it's time to stop pretending and rock someone for real.

If I'm gettin' real with you, I'd have to tell you that...I've been in a constant state of prayer.  Not for a baby...although that usually goes hand-in-hand...but for my heart. I'm in a constant state of prayer asking God to prepare my heart for His plan.  If His plan is for years of waiting....I need Him to prepare my heart so I won't go insane!

If I'm gettin' real with you, I'd have to tell you that...I can leave the house in the morning in a constant state of thankfulness, smiling, and nearly giddy and teary eyed at all the blessings I have been given...and all the good things He has done for me and my loved ones.  Then, at some point during the day, my thoughts drive me crazy enough to think I need more.  Hmmm...writing it out like that makes me feel selfish and ungrateful.

If I'm gettin' real with you, I'd have to tell you that...I was beyond grateful that my family decided to make a last-minute trip to Memphis to eat supper. I SO needed a distraction after a very distracted day.  There was no baby talk, no adoption talk, no looking at baby things. Just a fun distraction. And that was nice.

If I'm gettin' real with you, I'd have to tell you that...Every time I wish for babies to be placed, I'm hit with a feeling of guilt. Guilt because I know that every time a baby is placed with an adoptive family, there is a heartbroken birth family somewhere.  Then I'm filled with mixed emotions.

If I'm gettin' real with you, I'd have to tell you that...I'm convicted to be content where I am. That was my focus word for the new year, and BOY has it been tested!  I'm convicted to use my gifts now....to stop waiting for that "someday."  More on that later.

If I'm gettin' real with you, I'd have to tell you that...I know there are people all around me with REAL problems. I know that I don't have problems...I have more than I ever deserve.  I know this in my head.

If I'm gettin' real with you, I'd have to tell you that...I do trust Him with my plans. I trust Him with my future. I pray for His plan for our family. But, I also pray that He prepare my heart for His plan...help me to control my anxiety.  Maybe I should do that more. Obviously so.

If I'm gettin' real with you, I'd have to tell you that...I notice every time someone complains about piddly life issues. I notice. I think about all the blessings we all have...and how they outweigh our tiredness, our messy homes, our sleepless nights, our distractions, pains, and longings.  I think about all of that and try not to complain. At least to anyone other than my husband. Bless his heart!  And maybe my mom too.  Today, I'm not complaining.

I'm just gettin' real.

Lately I have found myself thanking God for things all throughout the day. Maybe it's my way of controlling my anxiety and giving myself a reality check.

Because if God was gettin' real with me...I'm pretty sure He would say..."Look around, child.  Don't you have more than enough? Have I not done enough for you?"  I'm pretty sure I would begin to sob as I think of not only the things, luxuries, opportunities, and relationships I have been blessed with...but of the ultimate sacrifice. God gave His ONLY Son for ME (and YOU). He gave ALL so that I could have the assurance of a home with Him in Heaven.  Jesus died on that cross so that I might live...forever.

How's that for gettin' real?

Fully Surrendered

I've been meeting with a group of women on Friday mornings for bible study...well, I've really missed as many meetings as I have been present for so far!  But our travels have slowed down...at least until the summer, so I'm hoping not to miss any more.  We are doing Priscilla Shirer's SEED bible study.  I absolutely love Priscilla's bible studies!  This one is a little different from the ones I've previously been a part of.  I actually like it.  Basically, we focus on one key word a week.  Then, we look at a verse(s) each day.  We are to pore over the verse, paraphrase it ourselves, pull from it, and pose questions for ourselves.  It's a great way to focus on and meditate on scripture.  Not using commentary from others, but seeing what we are able to pull from a verse alone.  I've enjoyed it.  Although, I must admit...after I pull my own things from a verse, I do end up looking to see what others have said.  I learn from them too and write down things I want to remember.  I guess you could call it a "collaboration!"  Ha!

One week, our focus word was "CONTROL."  How appropriate!  Control is always teaching me a lesson it seems!  I'm asking myself daily, "Am I fully surrendered?"

"Then He said to them, 'My soul is deeply grieved, to the point of death; remain here and keep watch with Me.' And He went a little beyond them, and fell on His face and prayed, saying, 'My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; yet not as I will, but as you will.'"  Matthew 26:38-39

This, to me, is the ULTIMATE EXAMPLE of surrender.  Here Jesus is...waiting to be crucified.  He obviously is pleading with God to "let this cup pass from Me," yet He is willing to do God's will.  He didn't want to, though.  We don't have to "want" to do what God is calling us to do...but we do need to submit to His will willingly.  Compare ANYTHING we are asked to do to the ULTIMATE EXAMPLE - Jesus willingly endured the crucifixion, death, and God turning His back on Him.  He took the sins of the centuries, nations, and ME upon Himself!  I think that we can follow God's will for us - it's the very least we can offer! And it's always what is best for us.  Jesus had all the power within Him to change the outcome.  But he didn't.  He corralled His strength and yielded to authority - His Father.  Surrendering to God's will isn't stripping us of power.  It is teaching us to yield to authority...to keep us from hurting ourselves or being dangerous to others.  The One with all the power, wisdom, influence, majesty, honor, authority, and heavenly supremacy made a choice to submit to authority.  Yielding to His Father's will.

"[Jesus] did not consider equality with God something to be used for His own advantage." Philippians 2:6

The question always arises...How do I know what God's will is?  How do I follow His will?

"Only be strong and very courageous; be careful to do according to all the law which Moses My servant commanded you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, so that you may have success wherever you go.  This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success."  Joshua 1:7-8

God's promise to us in these verses: We will have success.  God's command: Meditate on His word and obey His will.  God has given us the tools we need for success.  We just need to quit trying to do it ourselves and allow His will - not turning to the right or to the left.  How do we know His will?  Get to know Him better by reading His word.  Get in the Word, memorize it, analyze it, and utilize it!  Only if we really know what God says, will we know how to obey.  We meditate on God's word to understand.

The questions I asked myself after reading this:

• Am I veering to the left or right at all?  Do I get sidetracked?
• Do I meditate on His Word day and night?
• Do I use God's word to make decisions?

So many times we use our logic...our own reasoning to make big decisions that make sense to us.  God's way doesn't always make sense.  We need to get in His Word to see what He has to say to us. Learn how God feels about things.  Get to know Him, so that we will know His will.

 I have hidden Your word in my heart that I may not sin against You.  Psalm 119:11

I'll be honest, it takes tests and trials for me to fully grasp this concept.  Throughout our infertility and our adoption journey, I realize more than ever how little control I have.  I have NO control!  God has complete control, and I need to trust Him.  Some days I want to try grasping at something...anything...to take control of the situation.  However, God knows the perfect time and the perfect way to answer our prayers.  My prayer still remains, "Lord, prepare my heart for whatever Your will is."  That doesn't mean that I want to wait on His timing.  It means that I need His strength to get me through the waiting.  I know that His way is best, and I am willingly yielding to His control.  I must.  Yielding to His control keeps me from being dangerous. 

Fully surrender to His will...and let go of control!

Adoption Perspective

I mentioned in my last "Weekend Update" that many have been asking about our adoption status and progress.  Like I said, we don't get much information unless we ask or we receive THE CALL.  However, at the end of each year, the agency does send statistics out to all the waiting families.  Although statistics don't necessarily mean anything because no one knows from one day to the next how many expectant mothers will approach Bethany for support.  And, not all expectant mothers who receive support from Bethany will choose adoption.  Bethany Christian Services is an adoption agency, but that doesn't mean that they only minister to and service adoptive families.  Bethany Christian Services also ministers to and services expectant mothers and their families...some will become birthmothers, and some will choose to parent.

Nonetheless, it is a good way to gauge what has been happening within our state's agency.  It's good to have this information, so I'm not wasting away wondering about these things.  What we do know is that Mississippi's office has had more placements in 2011 than they have in several years.  There is no way to know if this is a trend or not.  Our office placed 25 babies last year - including two sets of twins.  It is very unusual to place that many children in one year.  In 2010, there were only 11 babies placed.  I have been informed, as I already shared with you, that things have been very slow so far in 2012.  That doesn't mean that 10 babies won't be placed with a forever family this weekend.  It just means there hasn't been much activity yet.  Now, to give you a little perspective...there are currently 26 families approved and waiting to adopt.  There are 15 families in the home study process.  As you can see, there are MANY families waiting for God to place a precious little one into their arms.  There is no "waiting list" with numbers.  No one will say, "It's your turn.  You're next in line."  Everything depends on what the birth parent(s) are looking for combined with what adoptive families are looking for.  Some birth parents don't choose...they allow the agency to place their baby.  Two of the placements in 2011 were designated placements where the birth parents and the adoptive parents had already connected and asked Bethany to facilitate.  I'm not sure, but I don't think those statistics include any out of state adoptions.  It is possible that an expectant mother from another state would choose us.  There are MANY ways in which an adoption can occur.

For those of you who are interested in background information, I hope this was helpful.  If nothing else, it gives you a better understanding of why some families wait a long time and some don't.  It should also give you a better perspective on our waiting experience.  I've also had people ask if we had our name out anywhere else...just in case there was a family looking to make an adoption plan for their child outside of our agency.  The answer is yes.  Obviously my blog is open for anyone to see, and there is a link to our adoption profile on the right sidebar.  There is a local OBGYN who has asked for our information.  We have some nurses who have our information in different places...labor and delivery and a walk-in clinic.  It is possible for birth parents to see our information online or otherwise, and contact our agency specifically for us.

We have NO idea how or when God has chosen to grow our family, but we do know that He has it planned.  We can't wait to find out, of course!

**In other news....My sister-in-law, Roan, is home from the hospital following her bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction.  She still has quite a road ahead of her, as the reconstruction process will take several months and the pathology reports will come back in the coming days, but she has certainly jumped a big hurdle!  She is resting well and being nursed back to health by Jimmy and several close friends.  You can keep up with her progress and/or look back at her journey so far on her blog.  Thank you, thank you, thank you for all your prayers this past week!  We have certainly felt them!  I know Roan's peaceful feeling leading up to surgery was due, in large part, to your many prayers lifted on her behalf.  Please know that we cherish them!

Seven Months

Sweet Baby J,

Yesterday marked seven months since we were approved to adopt.  It seems like I just wrote your six month letter...and now, here I am writing a seven month one!  Wow!  Your daddy and I have stayed pretty busy this past month.  I think staying busy is the best thing to keep us sane while we wait on your arrival.

Your daddy turned 30 since our last letter.  Yes!  30!  We had a fabulous celebration that lasted over two days!  In fact, our living room is STILL decorated with balloons and a Happy Birthday banner!  We celebrated with both sides of the family, and we were quite successful in embarrassing him and torturing him.  Bless his heart!  You would have loved it, I'm sure!  Hopefully, you will be here for his next birthday.  But, I must tell you that it will be quite a while before we put him through anything like that again!  Ha!  I wish you had been there, because he might not have been such a grumpy old man.  It does make for one hilarious story though! 

Your daddy joined your granddaddy and your uncles on a fun trip to Montana.  They went snowmobiling!  Doesn't that sound fun!?  They had a blast, and I'm pretty sure they still haven't told us everything that happened.  While the boys were away, the girls did play.  Ha!  I went with your SuSu and Aunt Kristin (and her college roommate) to Gatlinburg.  We played around and ate lots of good food.  You'll get to know, soon enough, that our food is pretty important to us.  Especially on vacation!  We certainly all thought about you while we were on vacation, though.  When we planned these trips, I wondered if you would make your appearance before we left or while we were gone.  I guess when you are waiting to adopt, you always have those thought when making future plans.  Obviously, you waited. 

Your daddy brought you "happies" from West Yellowstone.

For the record, we will be home until the summer.  There is plenty of time for you to join us.  Just sayin'! 

We watched a fellow blogger bring her twin babies home this past month.  They have patiently waited for about a year and a half...and have been through a lot.  I'm so excited for them!  At first, I checked her blog daily to see those sweet faces.  It's surreal to think that one day, they were going about their everyday business....and the next day, they were parenting TWO baby girls!  Wow!  Only one reason adoption is so exciting and special!  You, sweet little one, are a part of something wonderful!  And, I am honored to be a part of your story!  God has big plans for you.  This I know.

We have been blessed by so many who are lifting you, your birthmother, and our little family up in prayer.  Your prayer warriors have consistently prayed for you for nearly a year now.  I hope you grow to understand how blessed we are to welcome you in such a way.  You are longed for, waited for, and prayed for!  We can NOT wait to share you with all those who have been praying for you!  We can't wait for the day that we can show your picture and let everyone know how wonderful it is to trust Him with our future!  Your sweet story is such a testimony!  And, we are already so proud of you and who you will become! 

All we need now is...YOU!  So come on, Baby J!  We are waiting!  And praying!  And waiting!  And praying!  We are ready!

Love,
Mama

Weekend Update

I have a guilty pleasure.  Well, I might as well tell you, I have MANY guilty pleasures...one of those is the M&M Blast I'm eating right now.  Another secret pleasure is Saturday Night Live.  I still like to watch the show, even though some of the skits are beyond stupid and either way over my head...or way under it.  Ha!  But, I do enjoy it if I catch it on.  Last night, I just so happened to catch it when it was still on.  When I saw the "Weekend Update" segment that is usually pretty hilarious...I decided to do a little weekend update on my blog.  I haven't been very consistent lately, so I figured I'd do an overall update for the weekend.

So, here goes...Breaking News:

• Russ had to chase me down the hallway last night after I jumped out of bed and ran out of the bedroom freaking out and screaming about some kind of "sock thing" raising off the bed.  When I say "freaking out," I mean out of breath, nearly crying, yelling, and whining like a kid!  I had no pride at that moment.  And, obviously, no pride now that I'm sharing this event with you.  Russ ran back in the bedroom to look through all the covers.  All was clear, in case you wondered.  I was wringing wet with sweat and, quite frankly, still hesitant to get back in.  Best I can remember, I saw some kind of long sock snake-like thing raise its head off the bed down by my feet.  I must have been dreaming of such strange things and woke myself up to this chaos.  Which, in turn, woke Russ up to chaos.  Farley, however, never raised his head as he eyed this crazy woman who calls herself his mother.

• I just returned from my hometown.  I made a day trip to watch my old high school perform their musical, "Back to the 80's."  I had heard how cute it was, and I know a few of the students who performed.  Some of them, I used to babysit.  Talk about feeling old!  I always loved our high school productions!  Russ and I actually started dating after a few flirtations during rehearsals.  Ha!  Let's see...my freshman year, I played Penelope in Bye Bye Birdie.  Do you wanna guess who played Conrad Birdie?  The one and only Dr. Russ!  I had one speaking part (in addition to my tiny off-tune solo), and that was "Loop the loop!" as I held onto Russ's arm.  I was dressed as a cheerleader at that point.  I can still see that cute junior boy playing the guitar in his gold lamay jumpsuit!  Priceless!  My sophomore year, we performed Carousel.  This is the one that brought Russ and me together.  Well, I already had a crush on him.  The play just gave us extra time to see each other.  I think Russ played the part of the star gazer, and I played random parts...one included a horse on the carousel!  Ha!  Yep!  I dressed in a black leotard with a black tutu and tilted back and forth over one of the guy's knee.  That's the most I can remember about that one.  My junior and senior year, I played bigger roles.  My junior year, we performed Seven Brides for Seven Brothers...I played one of the brides.  Then, my senior year, it was Anything Goes.  I can't remember what my  name was, but I played one of the leading roles and sang several off key songs.  Oh, those were the days!  When I was quite unaware of my inability to act or sing!  Remember those days?

• I get asked about our adoption progress all the time.  I wish I had more to share, but I don't.  We are still officially waiting and have been for seven months.  We don't hear anything from our agency really.  And, we won't until we get THE CALL.  Our adoption worker calls every three months just to check in and answer any questions we may have.  So, I do know that everything has been very slow so far...as far as 2012 goes.  At our last phone call, she informed me that there had been one placement since January 1.  Since then, I know of at least one couple who has been matched.  Marcie and I are "blogger friends" (I guess you could say that), and she and her husband were just matched with TWIN baby girls.  Click here to check in on her and see those sweet faces. I don't call or email the agency every few days like I would like to sometimes!  Ha!  The reason I don't is because I am 100% positive Bethany Christian Services is taking care of us.  If you are considering adoption, the most important part of choosing an agency is TRUST.  I would be going crazy if I doubted my agency or worried that they were forgetting us.  It's impossible to know what our timeline will be.  No one knows how many birthparents will come to the agency at any given time.  But, we DO know that God has the timing perfectly planned!  

• I may not blog much about Mississippi State basketball like I do for football.  But, believe me, I am still a HUGE fan!  After a few (five to be exact) losses in a row, I was beginning to feel down about my Dawgs.  However, after an incredibly close game (leading nearly the entire game) against Kentucky, a very CLOSE call win against South Carolina in overtime, and an amazing game against Arkansas yesterday...I'm feeling pumped again!  Sadly, Russ isn't willing to make the 12 hour round trip drive to New Orleans and back to watch my Bulldogs play Georgia Thursday.  But, I WILL be watching if it's on TV.  If not, I'll watch online...as I have been doing.  I'm cheering them on!  I'm hoping we continue to play hard!  Go Dawgs!

• I have had a few emails and several people asking me in person about losing weight.  I am extremely self-conscious about sharing this information.  Mainly because I know that if I ever gain the weight back, you will notice it even more.  But, the easiest way to share the information with everyone is to just post it.  So, for those of you who are wondering...I have lost about 30 pounds.  I never really considered myself "fat," although my dear sweet grandmother did inform me this past summer that I looked "bigger than [I've] ever been."  Yes, I did smile.  Laughed even.  And tried to smart back...to which she just reassured me that I was, in fact, bigger than she'd ever seen me.  You gotta love the honesty of old people, right?  It's like kids.  They just say what they feel!  Ha!  That is NOT the reason I decided to try to lose it.  I just wanted to fit more comfortably in my clothes.  So, I began counting my calories at the end of July.  I had gotten to my goal weight around Thanksgiving.  So, I guess that makes the total time...4 months.  How do you count calories?  Well, I'm sure there are lots of ways to do this.  I didn't have the funds to join any kind of group or take any kind of shake.  I simply uploaded the Lose It! app on my iPhone.  I entered my information (age, height, weight, goal, how many pounds a week I wanted to lose, etc.) and the app told me how many calories I could eat daily.  I logged and measured every single thing I ate or drank.  I also quit drinking regular cokes.  That was HUGE for me!  I haven't had one since.  I really haven't craved it either.  Over time, you learn what's better to eat and what needs to be thrown out.  I also realized that my favorite thing on the menu at Olive Garden was nearly 500 calories OVER my DAILY limit!  Guess I won't be getting that again.  Ha!  I don't really count my calories anymore, but I do pay attention to what I'm putting in my mouth.  I also realized that I don't have to have that cookie or piece of cake.  I can do without those things and still live.  If I do splurge, like I do on vacation and over the holidays, I pay close attention to what I eat the following days or week.  I have not done the slightest bit of exercise.  I know that I should, and I know that I would be happier with my body if I did simply for the fact that it would help me tone up.  Maybe I'll get to that soon.  Ha!  My mom gave my sister and I a Hungry Girl cookbook.  All the recipes in the cookbook are under 300 calories.  Perfect!  My sister, the cook of the family, has used the cookbook several times and has loved everything she has made.  Including the red velvet pancakes with icing.  OH MY!  I have not cooked anything yet, but I have gone through and marked pages of things I want to try first.  I'll let you know how it goes.  I know that watching our caloric intake will help keep us healthier, so we intend to continue to "watch it."  

• We have started planning our TEN year reunion!  Wow!  It's hard to believe it has been 10 years since high school.  However, while I was looking through my old yearbooks trying to get things together for our class blog and Facebook page, I realized just how long ago it was.  I sure wish I had chosen a different hairstyle for that senior portrait.  Hmmm...

• As many of you have seen on Facebook, I have shared a link to my sister-in-law's blog.  Roan, my dear friend and sister-in-law, has recently been diagnosed with breast cancer.  Thankfully, the doctors are extremely optimistic about her recovery.  She will have a bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction on Wednesday.  The reconstruction process will take a few months to complete.  I am asking you to remember her and her family in your prayers this week especially.  Roan has been such an inspiration through this whole ordeal.  I won't share details here, but I will tell you that her positive disposition and her complete trust in the Lord and His plan is incredible...overwhelming even.  I'm still having trouble facing the reality of the situation myself, so I can't imagine her feelings.  I have felt so helpless as we have talked (Well, we mostly text and email!  Ha!) each day.  Roan has prayed me through and pep talked me through the last four years of our infertility and adoption process.  She has cried with me and for me.  She has let me vent to her and share things with her just because I needed to get it out.  I am so thankful for her friendship, and I want to and hope I can be there for her in the same way.  You can hop over to her blog to get details of her prognosis and surgical plan...I feel that it is her story to tell, so it's best for you to learn more there.  I know my blog readers are the best prayer warriors ever, and I know she would be humbled by your prayers this week.  Thank you, sweet friends!

I think I've given you enough updates for one weekend.  I hope you all have had a good week!  In case I haven't told you lately, THANK YOU to all of you who continue "praying for more."  I never forget about you!  I am thankful for you!  And, we can't wait to show you your answered prayers one day! 

...The Girls Will Play

That's right.

The guys went away...so us girls decided to play!

Desperate times...

Mama, Kristin, and I decided to take a little trip while the guys were away.  Kristin and Mama got the itch to visit Gatlinburg after Russ and my trip, so we booked it.  Kristin's college roommate met us there.  She lives in Washington DC and always loves a chance to visit with her old roommate.

We laughed because we were in Gatlinburg for five days and never really saw a mountain!  Ha!  Quite different from mine and Russ's trip, but still fun.  We stayed busy...mainly making sure we ate at all the restaurants we wanted to!  Ha!  Calorie counting was not a priority for us on this trip...although it was fun trying to guess how many were in each meal.

Of course, we started our vacation with a trip to Pancake Pantry, where I ordered my new favorite - Swiss Chocolate Chip Pancakes.  We made a second trip before the end of the week, and I got my signature Silver Dollar Pancakes.  On that first day, the temperature was in the mid-70's!  Crazy!  Especially since we all brought long sleeves, sweaters, and boots.  We spent our day walking around downtown, shopping in the little shops, and talking about where we would eat supper!  Ha!

Kristin and Ally were obviously not a fan of mine and Mama's shop choices.  Ha!

I stopped, at one point, to get something cold to drink at a little ice cream shop we passed.  It didn't take long for me to recognize the cashier.  Yep.  She was a contestant on American Idol.  If you follow the show, you may remember the girl who lived in a tent from Gatlinburg.  This is her.  I never saw her after that first audition, but she informed me that she was later nicknamed "Patient Zero," because they blamed her for getting everyone sick.  I obviously have no pride, because I asked to take a picture with her for Olivia and Jule, my nieces.  They are huge fans of the show, and I thought they may like seeing her.  I was right.  When I showed them the picture, they were very excited.

Me and "Patient Zero" (not sure of her name)

One thing Russ and I missed out on was a trip to the Apple Barn stores.  They were closed by the time we arrived for supper.  So, we called ahead for hours and spent some time shopping around.  We laughed because, thus far, all our purchases had been on food and drinks!  Hmmmm.

You can't leave Apple Barn without some delicious apple cider!

Picking up a few things: apple butter, apple fritter mix, and other necessities.

Our supper was very yummy.  It was good ole Southern food...and LOTS of it!  We sat on the side porch and listened as our waiter called us all "sister" and "Mama."  Interesting.  Ha! 

Ally and Kristin

Me and Mama

When we got back to the hotel, we made even more plans.  After much deliberation, we decided to walk downtown to Crawdaddy's Restaurant and Oyster Bar.  Not for food!  For KARAOKE!  Yes, we were ready to show off our chops...until it was time to put our name on the list!  We listened to everyone else sing.  Some wonderful.  Some thought they were.  We danced.  We laughed.  Then...we sang!  Mama was in charge of video.  Need I say more?  No evidence of our performance.  Ha!  And that's FINE with me!!

Ally and Mama

Me and Kristin

I think we got back to our room around 2 am.  Well worth our trip!  We popped in a movie and eventually fell asleep one by one.

The next morning...or should I say, afternoon...included a lunch at Bubba Gump's.  Gatlinburg was a ghost town until Saturday.  Apparently, there was a Christian Youth Conference in town, and it changed the whole town!  We waited about 30 minutes to eat.  And, before you ask, we did check every other restaurant downtown before locking one down.  They were all 30 minutes or more!  Crazy!  It was very good, and our entertainment made up for our wait.  Let's just say that not all Christian groups have as much fun as the ones I've always been a part of!  Ha!  #learntolaugh

Me and Ally

We had reservations at Dixie Stampede and had to be there by 4:30.  So we decided we had time to ride the sky lift before heading back to the hotel to freshen up and get in this new-found traffic.  Once again, we paid $13 to ride the sky lift...just to get a picture of it!  Ha!  Well, you just can't really go to Gatlinburg without riding the sky lift...plus I would take what I could get as far as seeing mountains!  Ha!

Me and Mama

Kristin, Ally, and me at the top

Ally and Kristin headed down

We made it back to the hotel in time to freshen up before heading to Pigeon Forge for Dixie Stampede.  The traffic was quite insane, but we still made it with time to spare!  I know you may be thinking, "Why would you go back if you've already been?"  Well, when Russ and I went in January, they were still featuring their Christmas show.  Now they are back to their standard show.  It was great!  There were several new parts that we had not seen before.

The pre-show was different too.  Very enjoyable.

And, as always, the food was INCREDIBLE!  Oh my!  I would go back every month just to have that food!  Beyond yummy!  Man, I want some of that soup and biscuits now!

By the time we got back to the hotel that night, we decided to make one final trip to Crawdaddy's.  We had some ladies depending on us to perform with them, and they needed all the help they could get!  Ha! 

I had already announced that my karaoke performing days had already reached the climax, so I left it with Kristin and Ally.  We saw many things Saturday night.  Some funny.  Some interesting.  Some horrifying.  But, they all made for some pretty hilarious memories!

So...the guys can go away if they please.  Just know that when the guys go away....the girls WILL play!