Individual Interviews

Well, we are moving right along in our home study process! I had my individual interview today, Russ has his Friday, and we have our home visit Saturday morning. It's very exciting to be proactive in the process while we can. It's enough to keep us busy. Of course, once all this is over...we'll just be waiting. It could be long...and seem even longer. Praying for sooner rather than later. But, we are mostly praying for His perfect timing!

So, what does an individual interview entail? Well, we pretty much just talked about my self study. Since I was so detailed on my answers (Imagine that! Ha!) I think it was pretty simple. There were a few things our worker had questions about, but mostly she just wanted to talk about my answers and hear me verbally explain my thinking and feelings about certain subjects.

We talked about my personality. She asked me to describe my personality in a few words or phrases and how it has changed over the years. Then, we talked about each of my family members and my relationship with them growing up and now. She took a few notes here and there on them. Does that make you nervous, Smiths? Ha! Going along with family, we talked about the way I was parented...what I hoped to emulate and what I wanted to try differently. We also discussed how I was disciplined and how I plan to discipline my children. We talked about my happy childhood memories and went on to talk about how close I was with my grandparents. We moved into the marriage section with a big question..."What has been the highlight of your marriage?" That one wasn't on the self study and I had to think. Have you ever really thought about that yourself? Especially if you haven't already experienced a child together? It was thought provoking, and the more I talked the more I thought of that were highlights. Then, we also discussed the most difficult time of our marriage. We talked about how we divide household responsibilities, how it has worked, and that we agree on them. She reminded me of how blessed I am to have a husband who helps around the house. Yes, I know! My mom reminds me of this all the time!! As we entered the parenting section of the interview, we discussed how I thought children will impact our marriage and how I plan to instill character, values, and certain qualities in our children. We also talked about our local school system. When we got to the adoption section, we discussed how long we have wanted to adopt and explain how infertility led us to this place. We talked about what I had done to prepare for adoptive parenthood and how we plan to talk with our child about his/her story and adoption. A difficult question was how I thought children who were adopted felt about adoption. It's hard to answer for something that you've never personally experienced. However, I have talked to several friends who have been through this and I shared what they had told me. We talked about my plans for employment in the future and what I'm doing now. Lastly, she asked me to describe my physical appearance complete with my weight! Ouch! Ha! I'm assuming this is for our physical description.

Our worker was so great to keep the conversation going very naturally. I did not feel like I was being interrogated or anything at all! In fact, our hour and a half went by surprisingly fast. I cannot say enough about how pleasant this experience has been so far! In fact, at one point, our worker smiled and said, "You're going to be great." How reassuring for this nervous adoptive mom wannabe!

I know this post is probably far too detailed for most of you, but I promised to share things I wish I had known. So I am. Remember, though, that all interviews are different. I'm sure each agency and each individual social worker conducts them differently. However, everyone I have ever talked with has said that it really is not a checklist of items and looking for one thing to take your name off the list. The home study process is really just a time to get to know you individually and as a couple. They want to see that they are placing a child in a loving home that has prayerfully thought through this decision and is ready to parent.

Russ has his interview Friday. So pray for him around 2:30. Then, Elizabeth will come to our home Saturday morning for our home visit. Yay! The home visit is the final part of our home study. Since she will be out of town after that, we don't expect our home study complete (if approved) until mid August. But, hey! That was my goal...end of summer! Woo hoo!! We have an adoption training on August 4th. I ordered a preview of my profile this week, and I'm ready to check it and order five for the Bethany offices.

We are moving right along!

Praying for More...